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Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home Wheaton106 North 10th Street
Wheaton, MN 56296
320-563-8136
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108 Berlin Ave. South
Herman, MN 56248
320-563-8136
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Our family dedicated to your family-Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home is committed to upholding the highest ethical and professional standards possible. We desire to meet and surpass your expectations in making final arrangements for your loved one. Our family is committed to continuously improving the personal and dedicated service that has come to be expected from our funeral homes.
Shawn & Heather Bainbridge
320-563-8136

Obituaries
Recent Obituaries
Ahrens, Henry
May 20, 2013
Henry Ahrens
May 20, 2013
Henry Ahrens, age 91, of Wheaton, Minnesota passed away Monday afternoon, May 20, 2013 at the Traverse Care Center in Wheaton. Funeral arrangements are pending.
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Blasing, Albert
May 19, 2013
Albert Blasing
May 19, 2013
Funeral Services for Albert Blasing, age 80, of Wheaton, Minnesota will be held Wednesday, May 22, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at Good Shepherd Lutheran Church in Wheaton, Minnesota with Rev. Thomas Olson officiating. Organist will be LeAnn Bjornson with special music provided by Peggy Corey. Pallbearers will be Adam Luebke, John Schurke, Adam Wilson, Aaron Julson, Nolan Wilson, Larry Luebke, Steve Fischer, Derek Anderson and Tim Luebke. Honorary Pallbearers will be the Traverse County Highway Department. Visitation will be held Tuesday evening, May 21st from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. with a 7:00 p.m. Prayer Service at Good Shepherd Lutheran Church. Visitation will continue Wednesday morning one hour prior to services at the church. Interment will be held in Wildwood Cemetery, Wheaton. Military Rites will be provided by the Merton Dale American Legion Post #80. Albert Richard Blasing was born on September 10, 1932 in Herman, Minnesota to Martin and Seani (Frey) Blasing. He attended school in Herman graduating from Herman High School in 1950. Albert was united in marriage to Jean Rustand on July 6, 1953 in Wendell, Minnesota. Albert entered United States Army on February 11, 1953 and served until his honorable discharge on January 21, 1955. For his service he received the National Defense Service Medal. Albert returned to Wheaton where he worked for the Traverse County Highway Department. Following his retirement from Traverse County he worked for Morris Sealcoat. Albert served on the Wheaton School Board, American Legion Post #80, Wheaton Community Hospital Board and Good Shepherd Lutheran Church Council. He enjoyed golfing, fishing, hunting, boating, spending time at the lake and spending time with family. Albert passed away Sunday morning May 19, 2013 at the Traverse Care Center in Wheaton. Albert is survived by his wife Jean of Wheaton; children: Mike (Cindy) Blasing of Wheaton; Laurie (Larry) Luebke of Albert Lea, Minnesota; Sara (John) Blasing of Richfield, Minnesota; Kathy (Bruce) Anderson of Eagle River, Alaska; grandchildren: Jessie (Adam) Wilson of Wheaton; Jenny (Aaron) Julson of Sanford, Florida; Tim (Laura) Luebke of Eagle River, Alaska; Adam (Heather) Luebke of St. Paul, Minnesota; Derek (Annie) Anderson of Eagle River, Alaska; Annah Anderson of Eagle River, Alaska; great-grandchildren: Nolan and Zoey Wilson; Landon and Brynn Luebke; Bodi and Bram Anderson; Zachary Julson. Albert was preceded in death by his parents and brothers Diz and Henry. click here to view memorial video
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Olhoft, Vernon
April 24, 2013
Vernon Olhoft
April 24, 2013
Funeral Service for Vernon “Bubby” Olhoft, age 86, of Norcross, Minnesota will be held Monday, April 29, 2013 at 2:00 p.m. at the United Methodist Church in Herman, Minnesota with Rev. Darrell Boe officiating. Interment will be in Lakeside Cemetery, rural Herman. Military rites will be provided by the Walter Larson American Legion Post #378 of which he was proud to be an active member. Visitation will be held one hour prior to service time at the church. Vernon Wayne Olhoft was born on October 2, 1926 in Norcross, Minnesota to William and Ethel (Cummings) Olhoft. He was confirmed on April 2, 1939 at Faith Evangelical Church in Norcross. He attended both schools in Norcross through the eight grade and continued working on the family farm. He entered the United States Army on December 5, 1945 and served until his honorable discharge on December 16, 1946. For his service he received the Victory Medal, Good Conduct Medal and Army of Occupation Medal (Germany). Following his service he was united in marriage to his sweetheart and friend Madge in 1954. The couple resided in California where Bubby was employed as a welder and cement finisher. Bubby returned to Norcross in the 70’s where he worked for area farmers until his retirement. Bubby enjoyed hunting, fishing, gardening, and the company of his cat “Tommy”. Bubby passed away peacefully on Wednesday, April 24, 2013 at the Good Samaritan Center in Hoffman, Minnesota. Bubby is survived by his “Granddaughter of the Heart” Carla, her husband Chad Benson and their children Devon and Summer of Elbow Lake, Minnesota; one brother in law Folkert Bruns of Herman; nieces and nephews: Lyndon and Jean Bruns, Sheryl and Blake DeCamp, Debra Olhoft and Pamela Olhoft; as well as several great-nieces and great-nephews. Bubby was preceded in death by his wife, parents, and siblings: Gladys, Walter, Alice, Lawrence, William and Kenneth.
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Christensen, Charlotte
April 21, 2013
Charlotte Christensen
April 21, 2013
Funeral Service for Charlotte Elizabeth Christensen will be held Thursday, April 25, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at First Presbyterian Church in Wheaton, Minnesota with Rev. Darrell Boe officiating. Visitation will be held Wednesday evening, April 24th from 4:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. with a 7:00 p.m. Prayer Service and Time of Sharing at the Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home in Wheaton. Visitation will continue Thursday morning one hour prior to service time at the church. Interment will be in Assumption/Calvary Cemetery in St. Cloud, Minnesota. The Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home is in charge of arrangements. Charlotte Elizabeth (Lucius) Christensen was born on June 9, 1943 to Irwin and Lorraine (Drongeson) Lucius. She was baptized on June 27, 1943. Charlotte graduated from Burnsville High School. After high school, Charlotte attended Mankato State University where she received her degree in Music. Charlotte married Wolfgang Sarrazin and to this union two children were born. They resided in Redwood Falls, MN. In 1974, Charlotte and her children moved to Willmar, MN where she met Gordon Christensen. Gordon and Charlotte were married on June 28, 1975. In October 1978, they moved to Wheaton. Charlotte attended the University of Minnesota, Morris, where she received her major in Spanish. As part of attaining her Spanish major she attended Middlebury College in Vermont to practice the proficient use of the Spanish language. Charlotte enjoyed music and was a member of the Tri State Band while she was physically able to do so. She also enjoyed sewing, knitting, ceramics, cooking, baking, reading, her grandkids, morning coffee, visits with close friends and of course shopping. In addition to her hobbies, she also enjoyed Gracie and Mary “the girls”, her beloved kitties. Charlotte was a member of the Presbyterian Church. She passed away peacefully on April 21st with her husband and children by her side. Charlotte is survived by her husband Gordon of Wheaton; her children: Stephen (Shelly) Sarrazin of Carrollton, Georgia, Christine (Daren) Stafford of Wheaton; her grandchildren: Nicolas, Jordan Elizabeth, Samuel, Mackenzi and Brady; and her sister Clairene (Kirt) Higdon of Corpus Christi, Texas. Charlotte was preceded in death by her parents Irwin and Lorraine (Drongeson) Lucius. click here to view memorial video
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Johnson, Travis
April 8, 2013
Travis Johnson
April 8, 2013
Travis S. Johnson, 33, of Lafayette, Indiana passed away at 9:19 a.m. Monday, April 8, 2013 at I.U. Health in Indianapolis. Born November 13, 1979 in Breckenridge, MN, he was the son of Gary M. and Vicky L. Johnson of Wheaton, MN. He graduated from high school in Wheaton, MN, and College at South Dakota State University in 2002. Travis married Lindsay R. Besonen on December 5, 2008 in West Lafayette and she survives. He was an engineer for Caterpillar from January 2007 to the present. He enjoyed his work, spending time with family and friends, playing golf and organizing outings, listening to music, playing basketball and volleyball, and traveling. He was a beloved friend, father, husband, brother, son, and uncle. Surviving with his wife and parents is a son, Gavin A. Johnson; a brother, Dustin A. Johnson (wife, Alexis) of Wheaton, MN and a sister, Amber S. Johnson of St. Paul, MN; grandparents, Merton and Vera Johnson of Wheaton, MN; mother and father-in-law, Bruce L. and Tyann M. Besonen; brother-in-law, Derek Besonen, sister-in-law, Lauren Besonen both of West Lafayette; a niece, Aurora Johnson and a nephew, Hunter Johnson. The family will receive friends from 5-8 p.m. Friday at Hippensteel Funeral Home. Funeral service 10 a.m. Saturday at the funeral home with Pastor James Barton officiating. Burial to follow at Frances Slocum Cemetery near Peru, IN. Memorial contributions may be made to The Travis S. Johnson Fund c/oRegions Bank, 3123 Union Street, Lafayette, IN 47904. Donation may be made to paypal at travis.s.johnsonfund@gmail.com. Hippensteel Funeral Home entrusted with care. Share memories and condolences online at www.hippensteelfuneralservice.com A Memorial Service will be held Saturday, April 20, 2013 11:00 a.m. at Bethlehem Covenant Church in Wheaton, Minnesota with Rev. Tim Shekleton officiating. Visitation will be held one hour prior to service time at the church. click here to view memorial video
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Lampe, Virgil
April 6, 2013
Virgil Lampe
April 6, 2013
Funeral Service for Virgil Lampe, age 87, of Wheaton, Minnesota will be held Wednesday, April 10, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at St. John Lutheran Church in Wheaton, Minnesota with Rev. Michael Breach officiating. Organist will be Sara Lee Rinke. Pallbearers will be Mason Lampe, Brayden Lampe, Skyler Smith, Blake Smith, Leland Sperr, Art Giroux and Ronald Piepkorn. Honorary Pallbearers will be Ronnie Hervey, Roy Hormann, Milton Schmidt, Gordon Jacobs and Eldren Lichtsinn. Interment will be in St. John Lutheran Cemetery, rural Wheaton at a later date. Military Rites will be provided by the Merton Dale American Legion Post #80. Visitation will be held Tuesday evening, April 9th from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. with a 7:00 p.m. Prayer Service at the Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home in Wheaton. Visitation will continue Wednesday morning one hour prior to service time at the church. Virgil Clifford Lampe was born on November 3, 1925 in Wheaton, Minnesota to August and Mabel (Hartwig) Lampe. Virgil attended country school south of Wheaton and furthered his education at Morris Ag School where he completed a three year program. Virgil served in the United States Army from October 19, 1950 until his honorable discharge on December 11, 1951. For his service he received the Korean Service Medal with two bronze stars. Virgil returned to Wheaton and was united in marriage to Betty Ertsgaard on June 7, 1958 at Mission Covenant Church in Wheaton. The couple lived in Fargo, North Dakota for a short time where Virgil worked at Corwin Churchill. The couple moved to Wheaton to farm and Virgil started doing auto body work in the winter. After his retirement from farming, Virgil worked as custodian at St. John Lutheran Church in Wheaton. Upon complete retirement he sold the farmsite and moved into the city of Wheaton. Virgil was a member of the Wheaton American Legion and VFW. He enjoyed going dancing and playing cards with family and friends. Virgil’s main goal was being the first spectator to arrive at his children’s and grandchildren’s sporting events and activities (Always had the best seat in the house). During quiet time he enjoyed assembling jigsaw puzzles and listening to Polka Party. His favorite TV program was The Price is Right. He also enjoyed cruising the countryside and watching the crops develop throughout the year. Virgil passed away on April 6, 2013 at the Rosholt Care Center in Rosholt, South Dakota. Virgil is survived by his wife Betty Lampe of Wheaton, Minnesota; son Dean (Sunnee) Lampe of Wheaton; daughter Mary Lampe of Savage, Minnesota; and four grandchildren: Mason Lampe, Brayden Lampe, Skyler Smith and Blake Smith. Virgil was preceded in death by his parents and stepmother Alma Crooks. click here to view memorial video
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Larson, Milford
April 6, 2013
Milford Larson
April 6, 2013
A Memorial Service for Milford Larson, age 81, of Herman, Minnesota will be held Wednesday, April 10, 2013 at 2:00 p.m. at the United Methodist Church in Herman, Minnesota with Rev. Darrell Boe officiating. Organist will be Debbie Blume with special music provided by Jerry and Junice Bryson and Todd Bartell. Honorary Urn Bearers will be all the school kids who rode his bus. Visitation will be held Tuesday evening at the United Methodist Church in Herman from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. with a 7:00 p.m. Prayer Service led by Scott Richards. Visitation will continue Wednesday afternoon from 1:00 p.m. until service time at the church. Inurnment will take place at a later date in Lakeside Cemetery, rural Herman. Military Rites will be provided by C. Walter Larson American Legion Post #378. Milford Larson was born on January 3, 1932 on the family farm near Herman, Minnesota to Palmer and Amelia (Ritzschke) Larson. Milford grew up on this farm and attended and later graduated from Herman High School in 1950. He was a proud athlete and standout basketball player for Herman. He was united in marriage to Helen Haugen on November 28, 1954 in Our Savior’s Lutheran Church in Norcross, Minnesota. To this union three sons were born: Keith, Randy and Scott. Milford entered the United States Army on September 15, 1954 and served until his honorable discharge on September 14, 1962. For his service he received the Good Conduct Medal and the Army of Occupation Medal (Germany). After his discharge Milford returned to the Herman area where he farmed with his father. Milford was born in and lived his entire life on the family farm. Milford farmed until his retirement in 1996. He was proud to drive “accident free” school bus for the Herman School System for over sixty years; first driving in the fall of 1950 until March 22nd of this year. He took great pride in his physical condition staying active by walking three miles almost every day. Milford enjoyed gardening, hunting and fishing, and following high school sports. He had a fondness for all children and dogs. Milford succumbed to cancer on April 6, 2013 at the Prairie Ridge Hospital in Elbow Lake, Minnesota. Milford is survived by his wife Helen of Herman, Minnesota; three sons: Keith (Norma) Larson of Zimmerman, Minnesota; Randy (Nancy) Larson of Herman, Minnesota and Scott (Joan Smith) Larson of Morris, Minnesota; one sister: Gaynice (Marvin) Greener of Minneapolis, Minnesota; four grandchildren: Luke Larson of Zimmerman, Minnesota; Dr. Christopher Larson of Alexandria, Minnesota; Colby Larson of Forada, Minnesota and Cassie Larson of Fargo, North Dakota; and his faithful companion Bee the black lab. Milford was preceded in death by his parents and infant sister Avis Larson. click here to view memorial video
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Fleischer, Margaret
March 22, 2013
Margaret Fleischer
March 22, 2013
Funeral Service for Margaret H. Fleischer, age 84, of Wheaton, Minnesota will be held Wednesday, March 27, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at St. John Lutheran Church in Wheaton with Rev. Michael Breach officiating. Organist will be Lonnie Schmidt with special music provided by Lynae Berger. Pallbearers will be James Fleischer, Jon Fleischer, Lee Schmidt, Alan Petersen, Gene Berger, Phillip Mitteness, Sam Thielen and Michael Larson. Visitation will be held Wednesday morning from 9:30 a.m. until service time at the church. Interment will be held in St. John Lutheran Cemetery at a later date. Margaret was born on April 12, 1928 in Wheaton, Minnesota to Frederick and Leona (Schmidt) Fleischer. Margaret was a homemaker and provided childcare for many children in the community, as she loved caring for and being with children. She found great interest and enjoyment in vegetable gardening as well as flower gardening. Margaret cared for her elderly mother for many years in their home. Doing embroidery work and playing cards, especially the game "Golf", were great pastimes for her. Probably her favorite "season" was Baseball Season as she was an avid Minnesota Twins fan, collecting memorabilia and clipping articles about her favorite team. It was her responsibility at the Care Center to post the Twins' scores after each game and she enjoyed helping at the Care Center with various things when she was able. She had a passion for putting together jigsaw puzzles for people in the community as well as for herself, and entered puzzles at the Traverse County Fair for many years. Margaret passed away on March 22, 2013 at Sanford Hospital in Wheaton. Margaret is survived by her sister Helen Semisch of Eau Claire, Wisconsin and her children Norman (Pam) Semisch and Mark Semisch; her brother Frederick Fleischer of Andover, Minnesota and his children Jon (Joanie), James (Dorrie), Ann Marie and Barbara Fleischer, and several cousins, great-nieces and great-nephews. Margaret was preceded in death by her parents Frederick and Leona (Schmidt) Fleischer, sister-in-law Beverly Fleischer, brother-in-law Arnold Semisch and niece Caroline Fleischer. click here to view memorial video
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Krenz, James
March 16, 2013
James Krenz
March 16, 2013
Funeral Service for James "Jim" Krenz, age 84, of Wheaton, Minnesota will be held Monday, March 25, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at Immanuel Lutheran Church in Monson Township with Rev. Michael Breach officiating. Visitation will be held Sunday, March 24th from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. at the Ranney-Bainbridge Funeral Home in Wheaton. Visitation will continue one hour prior to service time at the church on Monday. Interment will be in Immanuel Lutheran Cemetery. James Robert Krenz was born on October 25, 1928 in Wahpeton, ND to Robert and Esther (Johnson) Krenz, of rural Wheaton, MN. Jim attended school in Monson Township and at the Morris Agricultural School, Morris, MN. Jim farmed with his father until he was drafted at age 25 to serve his country during the Korean Conflict. Jim entered active service duty on April 20, 1954 where, as Private First Class, he served, among other duties, as a Structure Specialist. Jim was honorably discharged in February of 1956. Jim returned from service to continue farming. He married Shirley Ann Smith on February 25, 1956. They made their home in rural Wheaton. To this union, three children were born; daughters Jay and Tamara, and son Robert. As well as being a small grain producer, Jim also operated a dairy farm for 21 years. Jim was one of the first farmers in Traverse County to organize for the NFO, the National Farmers Organization. Jim served on the board of Traverse Coop Oil for 17 years. He was also very active in his church, Monson Immanuel, serving in a number of positions over the years. In 1991, Jim retired from farming. At that time, he began driving for the MN-DAK sugar beet plant out of Wahpeton, ND, hauling beets from terminals in the area to the plant in Wahpeton. During his summers, he worked for Larry Dolman, hauling grain for Larry’s custom combine operation from Oklahoma to North Dakota. Jim also worked with his daughter on her farm, enjoying his grand children by seeing them work alongside him. Jim was happiest in a ‘big rig,’ or in somebody’s new tractor. In 2007, Jim sold the farm site and moved into Wheaton. He enjoyed working in his yard, tinkering with his antique tractors, spending time with his grandchildren from Colorado on their visits back, traveling, and receiving company anytime someone stopped by to say hello. He and his sister Joyce, exchanged visits between New Mexico and MN until Jim could no longer travel to the ‘high country.’ He especially enjoyed exchanging stories with relatives and friends over an ice cold can of Coors Light. Jim passed away on March 16, 2013 at the Traverse Care Center in Wheaton. Jim is survived by three children: Jay Krenz-Lichtsinn of Bloomington, Minnesota; Tamara Krenz of Erie, Colorado; and Robert (Carolyn) Krenz of Boulder, Colorado; sister Joyce Eyster of Los Alamos, New Mexico; eight grandchildren and one great-granddaughter. He was preceded in death by his parents and one great-grandson. click here to view memorial video
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Sellden, Valerie
March 8, 2013
Valerie Sellden
March 8, 2013
Funeral Service for Valerie Mae Sellden, age 77, of Wheaton, Minnesota will be held Tuesday, March 12, 2013 at 11:00 a.m. at St. John Lutheran Church in Wheaton with Rev. Michael Breach officiating. Organist will be Sara Lee Rinke with special music provided by John Nerenz. Visitation will be held Monday, March 11th from 5:00 p.m. until 7:00 p.m. at St. John Lutheran Church, and continue Tuesday morning one hour prior to service time at the church. Interment will be in St. John Lutheran Cemetery, rural Wheaton at a later date. Valerie Mae Carlson was born on April 6, 1935 in Ashby, Minnesota to Peter and Gladys (Field) Carlson. Valerie married Louis Sellden on September 14, 1952 at St. John’s Lutheran Church in Dumont, Minnesota. Valerie was a wife, mother, grand mother, great-grandmother and homemaker. She worked as a Tupperware dealer, bookkeeper and cashier. She had many interests: cooking, sewing and gardening to name a few. She was active in 4-H, was a Girl Scout leader, a member of Minnesota Jaycees and held a state office of Regional V.P. She especially enjoyed working with young people in 4-H skits and one act plays. She shared many activities and hobbies with her husband. Together they enjoyed horses, fishing, camping, square dancing, gardening, making wooden crafts and wine making. They also enjoyed horseshoes and outdoor games. It was a blessing to share over sixty years of marriage with her spouse and being able to watch their family grow. She enjoyed family activities and gatherings, attending as many as possible. She loved life, family and friends. Valerie passed away suddenly on March 8, 2013 at Sanford Hospital in Wheaton. Valerie is survived by her husband Louis of Wheaton; four children: Ritchie (Barb) Sellden of Moorhead, Minnesota; Teresa (Roger) Abraham of Wheaton; Michael (Judy) Sellden of Fargo, North Dakota and Thomas (Sue) Sellden of Elkhart, Indiana; one brother John (Doris) Carlson of Newark, Ohio; nine grandchildren: Melisa Abraham Benson, Renae Abraham, Daphne Sellden Torbio, Jennifer Sellden Lowe, Heather Sellden, Tonya Sellden Tippett, Trevor Sellden, Joshua Sellden and Eli Sellden; nine great-grandchildren: Morgan Benson, Carly Benson, Austin Toribio, Alex Toribio, Dallas Toribio, Noah Kevorkian, Carter Kevorkian, Camden Tippett and Kinley Sellden; and numerous nieces, nephews and cousins. Valerie was preceded in death by her parents Peter and Gladys (Field) Carlson and one daughter Vickie Sellden. click here to view memorial video
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Planning a Funeral
Most of us are not prepared to plan and carry out a funeral ceremony for someone we love. And so much of the information available on this critically important subject fails to focus on what is most important: having a personalized, meaningful funeral that helps families and friends begin the healing process of mourning after the death of someone we love.
This section includes information that will help provide insights necessary to help you and your family create a meaningful funeral experience that both honors the life of your loved one and starts you on the path to healing from your loss. Some of the content on these pages is adapted from a website called www.MeaningfulFunerals.com and the teachings of Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a noted grief expert.
To learn more about Dr. Wolfelt, please visit www.centerforloss.com
Our funeral home's dedicated staff wants to help you and can play a critical role in planning and carrying out a meaningful funeral or memorial service. Our licensed funeral directors are intimately familiar with the funeral planning process, key decisions a grieving family must make, and necessary legal documentation that is required during this difficult time. Our funeral professionals can handle all of the details and help you create a unique service that fits your needs and values.
For more information, please select from the links below:
Meaningful Funerals
"You can have the experience and miss the meaning."
- T.S. Elliott
Meaningful Funerals
Meaningful funeral ceremonies make a significant difference in how families channel their grief toward health and healing. During the funeral, the community comes together and responds to the reality that someone has died, and also to the reality that those remaining will need support, compassion, love, hope, and understanding. The funeral encourages you to think about the person who has died and to explore the meaning of their life and the ways in which they touched the lives of others.
The remembering, reflecting and choices that take place in the planning and conducting of the funeral service are often an important part of the process of grief and mourning. And ultimately, this process of contemplation and discovery creates a memorable and moving funeral experience for all who attend.
Why Have a Funeral?
When we experience the death of someone we love, a funeral service fills several important needs. First, it provides for the dignified and respectful care of the person and special tribute to their life. Equally important, the funeral service helps survivors face the reality of death, which is the first big step toward taking grief from the inside and allowing us to express it on the outside through mourning. Together, close friends and relatives can lend support and consolation when they're needed most.
Learn more at MeaningfulFunerals.com
What Makes a Funeral Meaningful?
No matter what kind of funeral ceremony you are planning, it helps to understand the components of a meaningful funeral. Meaningful funerals are made up of different parts that, when combined together, make for an incredibly emotional experience for you, your family and friends.
Meaningful Choices
Helping You and Your Family Create a Meaningful FuneralThis is a naturally difficult time, compounded by the fact that you are faced with many decisions that must be made as you begin to plan the funeral. You may feel overwhelmed by these decisions. When you are able to make informed choices, you are empowered with the important information needed to plan a meaningful funeral.
This is not the time to deny your need to mourn and embrace painful feelings of grief in the coming days. You may feel deep sadness as you plan this funeral and begin to acknowledge the reality that someone who you love has died. But when all is said and done, you will feel deep satisfaction that you helped plan a meaningful tribute or ceremony for someone who meant so much to your own life, and you will be on the path to a healthy grieving process.
Making Informed Funeral Choices
After selecting a funeral home, you and your family will choose the type of funeral service to hold, what will happen to the body and where it will be laid to rest. How a body will be cared for after death is an important decision. Whether you choose burial or cremation, you can use elements of ceremony to honor the life of your loved one and to allow you and your family to say goodbye in a meaningful way.
Key Choices
Key Choices Needed to be Made for a Meaningful Funeral As you begin to think about the funeral and the many options you have, you may be faced with the conflict of honoring the wishes of the person who died as well as your own wishes as survivors. While it is natural to want to meet the requests of the person who died, do consider changes that will be helpful to you, your family and friends. Begin a Family ConversationIt is often helpful to have a family conversation before going to see a funeral director. This can be a time for expressing your grief together as well as a time for some initial decision-making. Try as best you can to include everyone in the discussion. No one should feel left out.
The Arrangement ConferenceYou may have already scheduled a time to meet with your funeral director to help you plan the funeral. This meeting is called the “arrangement conference.” During the arrangement conference, the funeral director will explain all of the choices available to you and your family, help you make decisions to create your unique funeral, and gather important information about the person who died to complete necessary documents. Above all else, the funeral director will assist you in both arranging for and carrying out a meaningful funeral.
What Kind of Funeral Service Will You Have?You can choose from a variety of funeral service types and formats. Some people think funerals must conform to traditional ways, but there is no one right way to have a funeral. Just as grief has many dimensions and is experienced in different ways by different people, funerals are also unique. A funeral should simply be fitting for the person who died and the family and friends who survive them. This is an opportunity to be creative and to share an honest expression of your most heartfelt values. There are no rigid rules that need to be followed, but there are guidelines that can help you if you are unsure how you might proceed.
Burial Considerations
Planning a meaningful funeral for a loved one is a ritual that almost all of us will encounter at some point in our lives. As you consider the various aspects of a funeral where burial is the final disposition, there are several elements that you can and will need to select in order to create a touching tribute for your loved one. These things will also provide comfort to those who are living as you pay your final respects.
Service and Ceremony
Service and CeremonyChoosing Burial
Planning a meaningful funeral for a loved one is a ritual that almost all of us will encounter at some point in our lives. As you consider the various aspects of a funeral where burial is the final disposition, there are several elements that you can and will need to select in order to create a touching tribute for your loved one. These things will also provide comfort to those who are living as you pay your final respects.
The Burial Committal ServiceWhen burial is chosen, the graveside ceremony is the final opportunity to say goodbye. Accompanying a body to its final resting place and saying a few last words brings a necessary feeling of closure to the funeral process. Families are often deeply touched by this ceremony, and its memory resonates for years. A meaningful committal service not only helps us acknowledge the reality and finality of the death, it also symbolizes the separation that the death has created. It is an essential ingredient of a meaningful funeral experience.
Direct BurialA direct burial is when there is no funeral service, but instead simply final disposition of the body by the funeral home.
A word from Dr. Alan Wolfelt
If you are considering direct burial, I plead with you to reconsider. Honoring the life and death of the person who died with some sort of ceremony - no matter how brief, how small or how informal - will help your family acknowledge the reality of the death and begin to heal. When no ceremony is held, it is as if the life and death of the person who died had no significance to anyone. Also keep in mind that you may still hold a committal service at the gravesite should you choose direct burial.
Think carefully about the many options available to you and your family. Slow down and plan. It is through planning that a meaningful funeral experience is created. And do remember that funeral directors, clergy, celebrants and close friends who have done these things before can all be valuable resources to you. You are not alone!
Burial Products and Personalization
Burial Products and PersonalizationCaskets
Casket Choices
The casket typically becomes the visual and emotional focal point of the funeral service, and just as important, serves as the final resting place for your loved one. The casket you choose can be more than just a burial vessel - it can become a touching reminder of all that made your loved one special. When selecting a casket, the first decision is typically the casket material - wood or metal.
The casket material chosen is often selected because it reflects the personality of your loved one. Wood is traditionally valued for its warmth and natural beauty, while metal is treasured for its strength, durability and elegance. Various factors impact the value of the finished product, including the species of wood or type of metal. Additional considerations include the design of the casket such as shape, color, interior fabric and hardware. Each of these can make a statement about the beloved individual, as can the features that allow you to create personal tributes to your loved one. These choices affect the overall appearance of the casket, as well as its value.
Metal Caskets
Metal CasketsMetal caskets, including those made from bronze, copper, stainless steel and steel, are known for their unique finishes. Bronze and copper are among the most durable and beautiful of metals; both are naturally non-rusting. Stainless and carbon steel caskets come in a variety of grades, gauges, styles and finishes. Many metal caskets contain features that help resist the entrance of outside elements.
Bronze & Copper CasketsBronze and Copper caskets combine quality construction and beautiful finishes. Many families choose these materials because they are superior to all other casket materials in strength, durability and naturally non-rusting qualities. Tools, ornaments and other artifacts from these materials can be seen in museums dating back as far as 5,000 years. A wide variety of styles, colors and features in bronze and copper are available, allowing you to select a casket that is suited to individual preferences.
Stainless SteelStainless steel is known for its quality and longevity, making it a valued material for casket construction. It is available in different grades, which are determined by the amount of chromium and nickel content — the higher the content, the higher the quality and strength of the steel and its corrosion-resistant qualities.
Carbon SteelCarbon steel caskets are available in multiple grades, for example (from thickest to thinnest): 16 gauge, 18 gauge and 20 gauge. While not as durable or resistant to corrosion as stainless steel, copper or bronze, a wide selection of colors, finishes and personalization features make these caskets an attractive choice.
Wood Caskets
Wood CasketsHardwood caskets include a variety of species: mahogany, walnut, cherry, sycamore, maple, oak, pecan, select hardwood and pine. Families who choose these caskets appreciate the qualities of natural wood. The warmth, beauty and personality it brings to fine furniture is also well suited for the construction of caskets. Some wood caskets are manufactured from solid specie wood, and others are constructed with high-quality veneers.
MahoganyMahogany is used extensively for high-grade furniture and cabinetry. It has a well-earned reputation because of its attractive grain pattern and beautiful natural luster.
WalnutConsidered a wood of beauty, walnut boasts a striking grain color and pattern. Walnut is warm and inviting, dignified and elegant, and engenders a pride of ownership. Having a natural lustrous patina, walnut is also known for its strength and durability.
CherryCherry is one of the most popular hardwoods. Because of its strength and stability, cherry is often used for burial caskets, paneling and gun stocks. Its rich, warm look and creamy, reddish color make it attractive.
MapleMaple is valued for its strength, wear resistance and beauty, making it a popular choice for flooring, especially for heavily trafficked areas such as a ballroom. But it's also a popular material used in making caskets. Maple is evenly textured with a natural luster. While the grain is usually straight, it can also be wavy or curly.
PecanPrized for the delicious pecan nut, pecan trees also produce a strong and heavy hardwood. Pecan is light in color and is often found in the construction of beautiful furniture and architectural paneling.
OakOak is a popular furniture and flooring favorite. This durable wood is used for doors, paneling, home furnishings and caskets. Oak has a prominent grain pattern that can be either tight or coarse, depending on the species.
PinePine has been popular since colonial times. There are nearly 100 species of pine, ranging in color from pale yellow to light brown. Though not technically classified as a “hardwood,” it is considered to be a durable wood, usually straight grained with an even texture.
HardwoodHardwood is a cost effective, yet attractive, solid wood product made from select wood species including poplar and cottonwood.
VeneerVeneering has been a standard in the fine furniture industry for more than 50 years. Veneered wood caskets incorporate quality craftsmanship with premium wood veneers and engineered wood composites that create a look and finish of warmth and beauty that many families are drawn to with solid wood caskets.
Personalize with Burial Casket Features
Specially designed features are available with many caskets today, and serve as another visual way to create an impactful and emotional expression during the service. There are numerous features and flexible ways to personalize a casket that reflect the personality and interests of your loved one. One such feature incorporates artistic designs that can pay tribute to an individual's life of service, passions and interests. These designs can be attached to the corners of many different types of caskets. Another unique feature available on select caskets is a special drawer where you can display cherished mementos during the service and place private farewell messages that can then remain in the casket with your loved one at their final resting place.
Several unique panel designs for the lid of the casket are also available, and each one offers its own dignified approach to serve as a special place and focal point for families to recall a life story and highlight the personal facets that made their loved one special. There are select caskets with panels that allow you to display artistically crafted medallions that can serve as a visual eulogy, allowing you to highlight the most meaningful roles and relationships of your loved one's life.
Some caskets include a pleated panel that enables you to display cherished photos and personal mementos near your loved one. Insertable panels are also available that include embroidered designs with tributes focused on relationships, service, passions and interests. In some cases, you can design or customize your own embroidered panel if standard offerings do not deliver that final personal touch. Some of the same embroidery designs can also be applied to other casket interiors, such as the casket overthrow or pillow.
Burial Casket Features that Encourage RemembranceMany of the designs and features used with the casket can also serve as personal memorial keepsakes, such as the medallions or corner designs. In order to allow healing to begin, it's important to accept that the everyday relationship with the loved one has moved from physical reality to memory. Many people find it helpful to have tangible reminders of their loved one, including items and symbols that relate to the final celebration of life. Keepsakes of various types, such as medallions, can also be engraved with the loved one's name and dates, or special designs that create even more meaningful and touching remembrances for current and future generations.
Ask your funeral director for more information on what is available to help personalize and encourage remembrance during the funeral of your loved one. They can guide you through the selection process and help you make informed choices.
Remembrance JewelryDesigned to hold a lock of hair, flower petals, earth from the gravesite or a small portion of cremated remains, keepsake jewelry is a unique way to hold a loved one close with a fashionable and lasting remembrance.
Burial VaultsBurial Vault Choices
Burial vaults are lined units that enclose the casket when it is placed at the gravesite and are designed to prevent the weight of soil and heavy equipment from damaging the casket. There are no laws that require the use of outer containers, but cemeteries often require their use, as it reduces the chance that soil over the grave will settle and helps with general gravesite maintenance and appearance.
Burial vaults are available in a variety of materials including metal, concrete and composite materials.
Unlined Outer Burial ContainerUnlined outer burial containers, or grave liners, are usually constructed of wood or concrete and may improve the appearance of the grave. These products provide a barrier that keeps soil and debris away from the casket during the closing of the grave. Some grave liners also provide structural protection from the weight of soil and heavy equipment. As these products are unlined, they provide no protection to the casket from soil and/or water making their way past the outer container unit.
Metal VaultMetal vaults are available in a variety of materials, including bronze, copper, stainless steel, galvanized and aluminum. These two-piece enclosures offer protection from the weight of soil and cemetery equipment, as well as keep the elements away from the casket. Some metal vaults feature beautiful ornamental details and can be personalized to honor your loved one.
Concrete VaultConcrete vaults are outer closures that provide structural protection from the weight of soil and heavy equipment and offer additional protection from soil reaching the casket. Concrete vaults are available in many styles including undecorated concrete finishes, metal wrapped tops and interiors, and simulated wood grain or natural stone finishes. Concrete vaults can typically weigh more than 2,000 pounds and can require additional costs for transport and placement.
Polymer VaultBurial vaults constructed of non-porous polyethylene and polypropylene material provide the benefits of being lightweight, impact-resistant and water-resistant. Polymer vaults can be constructed in multiple layers for added strength and durability. Their ease of handling also reduces cemetery labor costs and the need for heavy equipment during transportation and gravesite placement. Vault styles are available that can be personalized to help honor your loved one.
The Living Memorial ProgramBatesville's Living Memorial® Program is a unique and special way to honor the memory of a loved one. When you select a Batesville® burial product or an Options® cremation product, arrangements are made for a tree seedling to be planted as a living tribute - at no additional cost to you.
Seedlings are planted in national forests in cooperation with the U.S. Forest Service, The Canadian Forestry Association, The Grand River Conservation Foundation, and other international organizations to re-establish woodlands destroyed by forest fires, blight and other natural disasters. You will receive a special letter that verifies a tree has been planted where the need is greatest.
Cemetery Space, Monuments and Grave Markers
Cemetery Space, Monuments and Grave MarkersCemetery Space
Perhaps your family already owns a cemetery plot where the person who has died will be buried. If not, maybe you've noticed a nice local cemetery. Your funeral director will know which cemeteries are nearby and can help you purchase cemetery plots appropriate for your needs.
Traditionally, families have chosen to bury their loved ones in a cemetery. Entombment, which is the placement of the casketed body in an above-ground structure called a mausoleum, also takes place at a cemetery. When a casket is entombed, it is placed in an enclosure (called a crypt), and the front is usually sealed and faced with either marble or granite.
Many families choose burial or entombment at a nearby cemetery because it allows them to visit the gravesite as often as they like. This helps them continue to feel close to the person who died, while still acknowledging the death.
Because so many aspects should be considered when purchasing a cemetery plot, you may want to consider discussing the options in advance. Questions you may want to consider include:
- Does the plot meet my religious requirements?
- Are there any restrictions I need to consider based on the type of monument or burial vault?
- Does the plot include perpetual care and maintenance?
- Are plots available in the same location to provide for burial of the entire family?
Also called headstones, grave markers are used in cemeteries to memorialize and identify the gravesite of the person who has died. You may want to personalize the grave marker by including a poem, a drawing or a short phrase that defines the person who died.
Monuments and grave markers are available in a variety of materials, including natural stone, concrete and bronze. Styles can range from very simple to ornate, as single markers or companion monuments.
Sharing Memories
Sharing MemeoriesMemorial Websites
When someone we love dies, we often feel the need to share their story and the story of our loss with family, friends and our extended communities. A recent trend has been to memorialize loved ones by creating a website that honors their memory and mourns the loss.
The website can be created to house online video tributes and even guestbook memories collected at the funeral from family and friends. Some funeral homes offer this as a service, or you may be technologically savvy enough to build your own. Your imagination is your only limit to sharing memories and honoring your loved one.
Keepsake BooksFriends and relatives often share memories, stories, photos and condolences in guest books, both at the funeral and on the funeral home's website. At the funeral, invite people to write down a memory of the person who died. Ask children if they would like to write a letter or draw a picture for the person. Their “goodbyes” can then be saved for the keepsake book or even placed in the casket alongside the body. Many funeral homes offer keepsake book publishing services that collect and document these important memories.
Video TributesA video tribute is a unique way to personalize a memorial service - giving you and your family the opportunity to pause and reflect on the life of the person you knew and love. These touching montages can consist of music, photos, memorabilia, or newspaper articles that take viewers through the life of the person who has died.
Your video tribute can be played during the funeral service, during a visitation, or at any other time you and your funeral service professional decide upon. Many funeral homes can also post your video tribute to their website so that others can view it at any time. Tributes can also be made into DVDs or saved electronically for your family to keep. Your funeral home may offer this service or can recommend a local vendor who specializes in this area.
Cremation Considerations
When choosing cremation, it is important not only to capture the memories and celebrate the spirit of your loved one, but also to provide healing through gathering together, paying tribute and celebrating a life well lived.
Keep in mind that cremation does not limit your ability to spend time with the body of your loved one or hold a meaningful ceremony. You may have a visitation period and a funeral service prior to the cremation. Or your family may spend time privately with the body before cremation, followed by a public ceremony a day or two later with the urn present. You may want to consider keeping your loved one's body present for the funeral ceremony as it often encourages more expressions of grief and authentic mourning.
What Happens During Cremation
Cremation is another form of disposition or handling a body after death. However, many people don't know what happens during cremation.
Cremation takes place in a carefully maintained facility known as a crematory or crematorium. The funeral home may or may not have its own crematory on site, but your funeral director can take care of all arrangements either way.
Within the crematory is a special cremation chamber. The body is placed in a cremation container or casket and positioned inside the cremation chamber. Once the container or casket is in the cremation chamber, the door is tightly sealed. The operator then turns on gas jets, which create intense heat that reduces the body to bone fragments. This process takes approximately 2-3 hours.
After the cremation, the remains are collected and processed to the consistency of sand or a finer ash. The white or grayish remains, often called cremated remains at this stage, are then sealed in a transparent plastic bag along with an identification tag. The bag weighs about 5 lbs. and will often be returned to the family in a selected urn, which can then be buried, placed in a niche inside a columbarium, taken home or transported for scattering. Additionally, the cremated remains can be separated and placed into multiple urns, keepsakes or even jewelry specifically designed as a final resting place.
Cremation is a respectful, dignified process chosen by many families. However, some faiths discourage or prohibit cremation. If you plan to hold a religious funeral ceremony or have the remains buried in a church cemetery, check in advance to make sure there are no issues.
Service and Ceremony
Choosing CremationThis journey marks a new beginning; now is the most important time to come together and recount the fond memories that tell the story of your loved one. A variety of choices are available to create a loving memorial, bringing together family and friends for a final goodbye. Meaningful ceremonies with personalized memorials can be as unique as the loved one being remembered
When choosing cremation, the ceremony is a way to inform the community of a loved one's passing, tell their story and celebrate their life. A ceremony is most meaningful when it reflects your loved one's relationships, interests, and the moments you shared. Memorializing your loved one when choosing cremation may include one or any combination of the following options.
ConventionalFriends and family gather for a tribute prior to cremation, often with the decedent present, which draws support and allows family and friends to say goodbye.
MemorialThis gathering of friends and family following cremation often features the memorial urn as the ceremony's centerpiece and allows family and friends to recall memories and support one another.
PrivateA small gathering and informal family farewell takes place in a private setting and offers the chance to say goodbye, allowing family and friends to recall memories and support one another.
Direct CremationA direct cremation is when there is no funeral service or memorial service, but instead simply final disposition of the body by the funeral home or memorial society.
A word from Dr. Alan Wolfelt
If you are considering direct cremation, I plead with you to reconsider. Honoring the life and death of the person who died with some sort of ceremony - no matter how brief, how small or how informal - will help your family acknowledge the reality of the death and begin to heal. When no ceremony is held, it is as if the life and death of the person who died had no significance to anyone. Also keep in mind that you may still hold a committal service at the gravesite or crematory should you choose direct cremation.
Think carefully about the many options available to you and your family. Slow down and plan. It is through planning that a meaningful funeral experience is created. And do remember that funeral directors, clergy, celebrants and close friends who have done these things before can all be valuable resources to you. You are not alone!
Cremation Caskets and Containers
The selection of a cremation casket is just as important as the selection of the ceremony and will complement the tribute designed for the one being remembered. Before cremation, during the ceremony, and at the time of cremation, the casket or container is the resting place that gives dignity to your loved one. It may also be where you will see your loved one for the last time.
Cremation CasketCremation caskets are made of wood and available in a wide variety of styles that are suitable for services with a visitation, viewing or a gathering held prior to the cremation. The warmth, beauty and personality wood brings to fine furniture is well suited for the construction of caskets. Depending on your selection, cremation caskets can be personalized to fit your needs with accessories like custom tribute panels or custom embroidered interiors.
Wood Selections for Cremation Caskets
Hardwood caskets include a variety of species: mahogany, walnut, cherry, sycamore, maple, oak, pecan, select hardwood and pine. Families who choose these caskets appreciate the qualities of natural wood. The warmth, beauty and personality it brings to fine furniture is also well suited for the construction of caskets. Some wood caskets are manufactured from solid specie wood, and others are constructed with high-quality veneers.
MahoganyMahogany is used extensively for high-grade furniture and cabinetry. It has a well-earned reputation because of its attractive grain pattern and beautiful natural luster.
WalnutConsidered a wood of beauty, walnut boasts a striking grain color and pattern. Walnut is warm and inviting, dignified and elegant, and engenders a pride of ownership. Having a natural lustrous patina, walnut is also known for its strength and durability.
CherryCherry is one of the most popular hardwoods. Because of its strength and stability, cherry is often used for burial caskets, paneling and gun stocks. Its rich, warm look and creamy, reddish color make it attractive.
MapleMaple is valued for its strength, wear resistance and beauty, making it a popular choice for flooring, especially for heavily trafficked areas such as a ballroom. But it's also a popular material used in making caskets. Maple is evenly textured with a natural luster. While the grain is usually straight, it can also be wavy or curly.
PecanPrized for the delicious pecan nut, pecan trees also produce a strong and heavy hardwood. Pecan is light in color and is often found in the construction of beautiful furniture and architectural paneling.
OakOak is a popular furniture and flooring favorite. This durable wood is used for doors, paneling, home furnishings and caskets. Oak has a prominent grain pattern that can be either tight or coarse, depending on the species.
PinePine has been popular since colonial times. There are nearly 100 species of pine, ranging in color from pale yellow to light brown. Though not technically classified as a “hardwood,” it is considered to be a durable wood, usually straight grained with an even texture.
HardwoodHardwood is a cost effective, yet attractive, solid wood product made from select wood species including poplar and cottonwood.
VeneerVeneering has been a standard in the fine furniture industry for more than 50 years. Veneered wood caskets incorporate quality craftsmanship with premium wood veneers and engineered wood composites that create a look and finish of warmth and beauty that many families are drawn to with solid wood caskets.
In recent years, casket manufacturers have addressed the need for larger-sized caskets. Available in many of the same materials, colors, finishes and designs as in traditional-sized caskets, oversize caskets offer a more comfortable fit for your loved one when required.
Cremation ContainersCremation containers are made from both composite and solid wood components and are fully combustible. These are most appropriate when a private viewing has been scheduled.
Memorial Urns
Memorial Urn ChoicesThe urn or personalized memorial will become the final resting place for your loved one. The selection of the urn typically complements the final placement, whether buried in a cemetery, placed in a niche, or placed as a treasured touchstone in the home or garden. It can also become an ideal medium to facilitate ceremonial scattering. The urn or personal memorial you select will provide dignity, respect and a lasting tribute.
Final Placement ChoicesUrns are available in a wide variety of styles and materials. What's right for you will depend on your choice of final placement as well as personal tastes.
Burial
With the growing number of cremations, more families are choosing to bury the cremated remains of their loved ones as a way to provide a permanent place for future visitation. Many families choose burial or entombment at a nearby cemetery because it allows them to visit the gravesite as often as they like. This helps them continue to feel close to the person who died, while still acknowledging the death. Your funeral director will know which cemeteries are nearby and would best meet your needs. He or she can help you purchase cemetery plots appropriate to your needs.
Monuments and Grave MarkersAlso called headstones, grave markers are used in cemeteries to memorialize and identify the gravesite of the person who has died. To personalize the funeral service, you may want to personalize the grave marker. You can include a poem, a drawing or a short phrase that defines the person who died.
Monuments and grave markers are available in a variety of materials, including natural stone, concrete and bronze. Styles can range from very simple to very ornate, as single markers or companion monuments.
Cemetery PlotsCemetery Burial
Perhaps your family already owns a cemetery plot where the person who has died will be buried. If not, maybe you've noticed a nice local cemetery. Your funeral director will know which cemeteries are nearby and can help you purchase cemetery plots appropriate for your needs.
Traditionally, families have chosen to bury their loved ones in a cemetery. Entombment, which is the placement of the casketed body in an above-ground structure called a mausoleum, also takes place at a cemetery. When a casket is entombed, it is placed in an enclosure (called a crypt), and the front is usually sealed and faced with either marble or granite.
Many families choose burial or entombment at a nearby cemetery because it allows them to visit the gravesite as often as they like. This helps them continue to feel close to the person who died, while still acknowledging the death.
Because so many aspects should be considered when purchasing a cemetery plot, you may want to consider discussing the options in advance. Questions you may want to consider include:
- Does the plot meet my religious requirements?
- Are there any restrictions I need to consider based on the type of monument or burial vault?
- Does the plot include perpetual care and maintenance?
- Are plots available in the same location to provide for burial of the entire family?
Niche
A niche is a recessed compartment typically found in a columbarium or mausoleum to hold an urn. The niche may be open-front, protected by glass (this option allows viewing of the urn), or closed-front, faced with bronze, marble or granite. Generally, the urn containing the cremated remains is placed inside the niche and the front is sealed. Many urn styles can be placed in a niche.
Ceremonial Scattering
Complete or ceremonial scattering is a symbolic release of your loved one back into the world. This can be done in a variety of ways. Biodegradable urns made of unbleached pressed cotton can facilitate underground or water scattering. Some urns are designed for ceremonial scattering and are therefore lightweight, easy to open and safe to hold at multiple angles.
Home Display
You may want to memorialize your loved one in your home after cremation. Many urn styles provide a touching and discreet way to hold the memory of your loved one close. Urns are available in natural stone like marble, a variety of metals such as bronze and copper, and beautiful wood finishes like oak, cherry or mahogany. Cast acrylic and cast bronze statuary art urns are also available in a variety of styles. Products for memorials in the garden or landscape, including wind chimes, birdbaths and sundials, are also an option.
Personalizing and Customizing the Memorial
To add a heartfelt and individual touch, your loved one's personalized life story message can be applied throughout the ceremony or gathering, as well as to the container, memorial urn and keepsakes you choose. Smaller urns, keepsakes, and remembrance jewelry can be given to family members and close friends.
Urn Vaults
The urn or personalized memorial will become the final resting place for your loved one. The selection of the urn typically complements the final placement, whether buried in a cemetery, placed in a niche, or placed as a treasured touchstone in the home or garden. It can also become an ideal medium to facilitate ceremonial scattering. The urn or personal memorial you select will provide dignity, respect and a lasting tribute.
Urn vaults are lined units that enclose the urn when it is placed at the gravesite. They are designed to prevent the weight of soil and heavy equipment from damaging the urn and environmental protection. There are no laws that require the use of urn vaults, but cemeteries often require their use as they prevent the grave from settling and help with general gravesite maintenance and appearance.
Urn vaults are available in a variety of materials, including cultured granite, metal, concrete and composite materials or a combination of materials. Urn vault options also include a large selection of interiors, including smooth or textured finishes as well as fabric choices. Urn vault styles are available that can be personalized to help honor your loved one.
Sharing Memories
Memorial WebsitesWhen someone we love dies, we often feel the need to share their story and the story of our loss with family, friends and our extended communities. A recent trend has been to memorialize loved ones by creating a website that honors their memory and mourns the loss.
The website can be created to house online video tributes and even guestbook memories collected at the funeral from family and friends. Some funeral homes offer this as a service, or you may be technologically savvy enough to build your own. Your imagination is your only limit to sharing memories and honoring your loved one.
Keepsake BooksFriends and relatives often share memories, stories, photos and condolences in guest books, both at the funeral and on the funeral home's website. At the funeral, invite people to write down a memory of the person who died. Ask children if they would like to write a letter or draw a picture for the person. Their “goodbyes” can then be saved for the keepsake book or even placed in the casket alongside the body. Many funeral homes offer keepsake book publishing services that collect and document these important memories.
Video TributesA video tribute is a unique way to personalize a memorial service - giving you and your family the opportunity to pause and reflect on the life of the person you knew and love. These touching montages can consist of music, photos, memorabilia, or newspaper articles that take viewers through the life of the person who has died.
Your video tribute can be played during the funeral service, during a visitation, or at any other time you and your funeral service professional decide upon. Many funeral homes can also post your video tribute to their website so that others can view it at any time. Tributes can also be made into DVDs or saved electronically for your family to keep. Your funeral home may offer this service or can recommend a local vendor who specializes in this area.
Keepsakes & Remembrance Jewelry
Keepsake urns are smaller versions of full size urns and are manufactured to hold a small portion of cremated remains, a lock of hair or ceremonial flowers. Keepsake urns allow you to share your loved one's cremated remains with family and close friends.
Designed to hold a small portion of cremated remains, a lock of hair, flower petals, or earth from the gravesite, keepsake jewelry is a unique and elegant way to hold a loved one close with a fashionable and lasting remembrance. Available in men's and women's styles, consider selecting a matching piece for family members or friends to share a special and lasting bond.
Living Memorial
Batesville's Living Memorial® Program is a unique and special way to honor the memory of a loved one. When you select a Batesville® burial product or an Options® cremation product, arrangements are made for a tree seedling to be planted as a living tribute - at no additional cost to you.
Seedlings are planted in national forests in cooperation with the U.S. Forest Service, The Canadian Forestry Association, The Grand River Conservation Foundation, and other international organizations to re-establish woodlands destroyed by forest fires, blight and other natural disasters. You will receive a special letter that verifies a tree has been planted where the need is greatest.
Guides and Resources
When a loved one dies, grieving family members and friends are often confronted with dozens of decisions about the funeral.
This section is designed to give you an overview of frequently asked questions as well as provide additional support, grief resources and other important information that may help you at this difficult time.
FAQs to Planning a Meaningful Funeral
FAQs to Planning a Meaningful FuneralAs you and your family begin the funeral planning process, a number of questions will surface that you will need further insight on in order to make nformed decisions. Below please find a number of frequently asked questions and clarifications on misconceptions of funerals that may help you as you plan a meaningful funeral to honor the unique life of your loved one.
Why do I need to plan a funeral for my loved one?One of the most important reasons for planning a meaningful funeral is that it helps you and your family focus your thoughts and feelings on something positive. The funeral encourages you to think about the person who died and explore the meaning of their life and the ways in which they touched the lives of others.
The remembering, reflecting and choices that take place in the planning and conducting of the funeral service are often an important part of the process of grief and mourning. And ultimately, this process of contemplation and discovery creates a memorable and moving funeral experience for all who attend.
What makes a funeral meaningful?Meaningful funerals are made up of different parts (music, readings, visitation/reception, eulogy/remembrance memories, symbols, procession, committal service and gathering) that, when combined, make for an incredibly meaningful experience for you, your family and friends. Even among different faiths and cultures, funeral ceremonies throughout North America often include many of the same elements. Your faith or culture may have its own variations on these elements and you should be encouraged to follow them as you see fit.
Who should I turn to for help to plan a meaningful funeral?The funeral home and its staff play a critical role in the planning and conducting of a meaningful funeral. They are the people with the training and expertise you will rely on in the days leading up to the funeral. Their advice, compassion, attention to detail and willingness to personalize the ceremony will greatly influence your funeral experience.
What kind of funeral service should I have?You can choose from a variety of funeral service types and formats. Some people think that funerals must conform to traditional ways, but there is no one right way to have a funeral. Just as grief has many dimensions and is experienced in different ways by different people, funerals are also unique. A funeral should simply be fitting for the person who died and the family and friends who survive. This is an opportunity to be creative and to share an honest expression of your most heartfelt values. There are no rigid rules that need to be followed, but there are guidelines that can help you if you are unsure how you might proceed.
How do I ensure the funeral is personalized?The funeral service you plan should be as special as the life you will be remembering. Here are a few ideas:
- Write a personalized obituary.
- Create a column in the guest book for people to jot down a memory after they sign their name.
- Display personal items and hobby items on a table at the visitation.
- Show a DVD or slide show of the person's life during the funeral.
- Select flowers that were meaningful to the person who died.
- Use a lot of music, especially if music was meaningful to the person who died or means something to your family.
- At the funeral, invite people to write down a memory of the person who died. Appoint someone to gather and read the memories aloud.
- Create a personalized grave marker.
Your family must choose not only the type of funeral service to hold but also what will happen to the body and where it will be laid to rest.
Embalming is how the funeral home temporarily preserves the body of the person who died so it can be viewed by the family. Embalming also allows a number of days to elapse before burial and cremation, thus giving family and friends time to prepare and gather for the funeral.
The body of the person who died is the most important symbol to include in the funeral service. Whether present in an open or unopened casket, the body serves as the emotional focus for mourners and helps them acknowledge and embrace their pain. When a body or cremated remains are buried or scattered, there is a “place” for families to go when they want to feel close to their loved one.
Families who have spent time with the body have said it has helped them come to terms with the death and begin to transition from life before the death to life after the death. Although it can be emotionally painful, time spent with the body is often helpful to many people.
If my loved one is being cremated, what happens during cremation?Cremation is another form of disposition or handling a body after death. However, many people don't know what happens during cremation.
Cremation takes place in a carefully maintained facility known as a crematory or crematorium. The funeral home may or may not have its own crematory on site, but your funeral director can take care of all arrangements either way.
Within the crematory is a special cremation chamber. The body is placed in a cremation container or casket and positioned inside the cremation chamber. Once the container or casket is in the cremation chamber, the door is tightly sealed. The operator then turns on gas jets, which create intense heat that reduces the body to bone fragments. This process takes approximately 2-3 hours.
After the cremation, the remains are collected and processed to the consistency of sand or a finer ash. The white or grayish remains, often called cremated remains at this stage, are then sealed in a transparent plastic bag along with an identification tag. The bag weighs about 5 lbs. and will often be returned to the family in a selected urn, which can then be buried, placed in a niche inside a columbarium, taken home or transported for scattering. Additionally, the cremated remains can be separated and placed into multiple urns, keepsakes or even jewelry specifically designed as a final resting place.
Cremation is a respectful, dignified process chosen by many families. However, some faiths discourage or prohibit cremation. If you plan to hold a religious funeral ceremony or have the remains buried in a church cemetery, check in advance to make sure there are no issues.
Should I involve our children in the funeral?Most of the rituals in our society focus on children. Unfortunately, the funeral ritual, whose purpose is to help mourners begin to heal, is often not seen as a ritual for kids. Too often, children are not included in the funeral because adults want to protect them.
Funerals are painful, but children have the same rights and privileges to participate in them as adults do.
Here are ways to appropriately include children:
- Help explain the funeral to them - Tell children what will happen before, during and after the ceremony. Give as many specifics as they seem interested in hearing.
- If the body will be viewed either at a visitation or at the funeral itself, let the child know this in advance. Explain what the casket and body will look like. If the body is to be cremated, explain what cremation means and what will happen to the cremated remains.
- Find age-appropriate ways for children to take part in the funeral - grieving children feel included when they can share a favorite memory or read a special poem as part of the funeral. Shyer children can participate by lighting a candle or placing something special in the casket (a memento, a drawing, a letter or a photo).
- Understand that children often need to accept their grief in doses, and that outward signs of grief may come and go. It is not unusual, for example, for children to want to roughhouse with their cousins during the visitation or play video games right after the funeral. Respect the child's need to be a child during this extraordinarily difficult time.
Glossary of Funeral Terms
Glossary of Funeral TermsAs the planning begins, you may be introduced to new words and terms that are associated with the funeral planning process. We have provided a quick glossary for your reference.
- Arrangement conference - The meeting with the funeral director in which you discuss your wishes for the funeral and the disposition of the body
- Burial - Also called interment, earth burial at a cemetery is the most traditional method for final disposition of the body
- Celebrant - A person who provides personalized services to a family to create a meaningful ceremony or ritual during a life transition
- Columbarium - An above-ground structure for final disposition of cremated remains
- Committal service - A brief graveside ceremony held with the casket or urn present before it is lowered into the ground
- Cremation - A form of disposition that involves reducing the body through intense heat to cremated remains
- Crypt - An above ground burial site in a mausoleum
- Direct cremation - Cremation without a funeral or memorial service
- Embalming - A method of preserving the body for a number of days following the death, allowing the family to view the body and hold the funeral service on a day that is convenient for out-of-town friends and relatives
- Entombment - Placement of the casket in an above-ground structure called a mausoleum
- Funeral - The ceremony that honors the end of a person's life
- Grave liner - An unlined outer burial container
- Honorarium - The fee typically paid to a clergyperson or celebrant for officiating the funeral ceremony and to musicians or soloists for their contributions
- Mausoleum - A small building in a cemetery that is like a burial plot above the ground
- Niche - One of a number of recesses in the wall of a columbarium where the urn containing cremated remains is placed
- Obituary - A notice in the newspaper that announces the death to the community, summarizes the person's life and invites readers to attend the funeral and/or make memorial contributions in the name of the person who died
- Pallbearers - The people who carry the casket from the ceremony to the hearse and from the hearse to the gravesite
- Urn - A small vase-like container specially designed for holding cremated remains
- Vault - A concrete or metal container into which the casket is placed before burial at a cemetery
- Visitation - A scheduled time for family and friends to see the person who died, perhaps for the final time
Pre-Planning
PreplanningThe Advantages of Planning Ahead
The idea behind planning ahead is simple. One day, a great deal of vital information about you or a loved one will be needed by your family and anyone whose responsibility it is to assist them. Those who plan ahead can be assured that, not only will their personal wishes be fulfilled, but other unnecessary difficulties will be avoided.
Both you and your loved ones can benefit when funeral arrangements are made well ahead of need. It can be beneficial to include your immediate family in those plans, ensuring those left behind are aware of your wishes and able to plan a meaningful funeral that will help them begin their mourning. By discussing plans in advance, you can take all the time necessary to make decisions about cremation or burial, type of ceremony and other funeral elements.
You may want to discuss your thoughts and decisions with your family and a funeral service professional. The Meaningful Funerals Companion Guide can be used to capture your wishes and biographical information in advance. Upon completion, simply store it in a safe place with your other important documents.
Recommended Reading
Recommended ReadingMost of us are not prepared to plan and carry out a funeral ceremony for the death of someone we love. And so much of the information available on this critically important subject fails to focus on what is most important: having a personalized, meaningful funeral that helps families and friends begin mourning after the death of someone they love.
In addition to the information contained in this website, a list of recommended reading is provided below to help you understand your choices and allow you to plan the most meaningful funeral for your loved one.
Dr. Alan Wolfelt- Wolfelt, Alan, Creating Meaningful Funeral Ceremonies: A Guide for Caregivers, Fort Collins, Colorado: Companion Press, 2011
- Wolfelt, Alan,Creating Meaningful Funeral Ceremonies: A Guide for Families, Fort Collins, Colorado: Companion Press, 2011
- Wolfelt, Alan, The Journey through Grief: Reflections on Healing, Fort Collins, Colorado: Companion Press, 1996
- Wolfelt, Alan, Understanding Your Grief: Ten Essential Touchstones for Finding Hope and Healing Your Heart, Fort Collins, Colorado: Companion Press, 2003
Other Authors
- Fulghum, Robert, From Beginning to End: The Rituals of Our Lives, New York: Villard Books, 1995
- Long, Thomas G., Accompany Them With Singing: The Christian Funeral, Louisville, Kentucky: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009
- Metrick, S.B., Crossing the Bridge: Creating Ceremonies for Grieving and Healing from Life#8217;s Losses, Berkeley: Celestial Arts, 1994
- Noel, Brook and Pamela Blair, Ph.D., I Wasn#8217;t Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Sudden Death of a Loved One, Milwaukee: Champion Press, 2008
- York, Sarah, Remembering Well: Rituals for Celebrating Life and Mourning Death, San Francisco: Jossey Bass, 2000
Recommended Links
Someone you loved has died. You are beginning a journey that is often frightening, painful and sometimes lonely. No words, written or spoken, can take away the pain you now feel.
The following organizations are additional sources of information, education and referral that may bring you some comfort and encouragement as you make a commitment to help yourself heal.
Funerals and Related Matters - National Organizations and Support Resources
- International Cemetery, Cremation & Funeral Association - http://www.iccfa.com
- Cremation Association of North America - info@cremationsassociations.org
- International Order of the Golden Rule - info@ogr.org
- National Funeral Directors Association - http://www.nfda.org
- Selected Independent Funeral Homes - http://www.selectedfuneralhomes.org
- Funeral Service Association of Canada - http://www.fsac.ca
National Self-Help Organizations and Support Groups
- AARP, Widowed Person's Services - http://www.aarp.org
Independent branches of this organization can be found by searching online for Widowed Persons Services and the name of your town and state. - American Association of Suicidology - http://suicidology.org
Information and resources; referrals to suicide survivor groups - Center for Loss and Life Transition - http://centerforloss.com
Resources, education and training, and referral for bereaved families; provides certificate program in Death and Grief studies for bereavement professionals - The Compassionate Friends - http://www.compassionatefriends.org
Information and resources for bereaved families who have experienced the death of a child - The Dougy Center - http://www.dougy.org
Information, education, referral and support for children and families; publishes a national directory of support programs for bereaved children - Share - http://nationalshare.org
Pregnancy and infant loss support - Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) - http://www.MADD.org
Education, resources and advocacy for bereaved families - Parents of Murdered Children, Inc - http://www.pomc.com
Information, resources and support for bereaved families - National Hospice and Palliative Care - http://www.nhpco.org
- National Institute of Mental Health Public Inquiries - http://www.nimh.nih.gov
Education and publications for families and professionals
Pre-Planning
Life Choices
Most of us plan ahead in life. We plan for our wedding, our children's education, family vacations, and other significant expected life events. We also plan for the unexpected events of life by purchasing home, auto and medical insurance.Understanding the benefits of pre-planning has prompted many to take the step to pre-plan their own arrangements.
Please call us at (320) 563-8136 to set up an appointment to discuss pre-planning with a caring professional.
Why Pre-Plan?
Peace of MindMany who have undergone the emotional strain of arranging a funeral within hours of losing a loved one have made the choice to pre-plan their own funeral. Doing so lifts the burden from their loved ones by relieving decision-making pressure at a time of grief and emotional stress.
Personal Choice
Funeral arrangements are a deeply personal choice. Pre-planning provides you with the time needed to make practical, detailed decisions that reflect your standards, lifestyle, taste and budget. And we assure you and your family that the choices you make will be carried out as planned.
Lower Costs
When you finalize your plan, we can advise you of the total cost. You do not have to set aside funds for your plan, but doing so protects you against escalating funeral costs. By locking in today's funeral costs and ensuring that the necessary funds are set aside, you help relieve yourself of unnecessary future worry and your survivors of an unexpected expense.
Immediate Arrangements
In Time of Need
We understand that making the many decisions which come at a time of loss can be difficult. We offer our support by providing you with options as you consider making immediate arrangements.
Please call us at (320) 563-8136 to make arrangements in person with a caring, professional Funeral Director.
Grief Support
Welcome to the Griefwords Online Library
Brought to you by the Center for Loss and Life Transition - Alan Wolfelt, Ph.D., Director
Helping Others with Grief
A friend has experienced the death of someone loved. How can you help? The following articles provide many practical suggestions for helping others with grief:
Helping a Friend in Grief
Helping a Grandparent Who is Grieving
Helping a Grieving Friend in the Workplace
Helping a Suicide Survivor Heal
Helping Your Family When a Member is Dying
Helping Yourself with Grief
Someone you love has died. You are now faced with the difficult, but important, need to mourn. Mourning is the open expression of your thoughts and feelings regarding the death and the person who died. It is an essential part of healing. The following articles provide many practical suggestions to help you move toward healing in your unique grief journey.
Mustering the Courage to Mourn
Love and Grief:
In Communion and Greater Than the Sum of Their Parts
Helping Yourself Heal When Someone Loved Dies
Will I Befriend My Feelings Or Will I Deny, Repress, Or Inhibit Them?
Helping Yourself Heal When Your Spouse Dies
Helping Yourself Heal When Your Child Dies
Helping Yourself Heal When Your Parent Dies
Helping Yourself Heal When a Baby Dies
Helping Yourself Heal During the Holiday Season
For and About Grieving Children and Teenagers
Children and teenagers have special needs following the death of a friend or family member. The following articles provide wonderful insight in helping children and teens understand and express their grief.
How to Talk to the Children and Teens in Your Life About the Newtown, CT Tragedy
Helping Infants and Toddlers Cope with Grief
Helping Children Cope With Grief
Helping Children with Funerals
Helping Teenagers Cope with Grief
Recommended Links
Someone you loved has died. You are beginning a journey that is often frightening, painful and sometimes lonely. No words, written or spoken, can take away the pain you now feel.
The following organizations are additional sources of information, education and referral that may bring you some comfort and encouragement as you make a commitment to help yourself heal.
Funerals and Related Matters - National Organizations and Support Resources
- International Cemetery, Cremation & Funeral Association - http://www.iccfa.com
- Cremation Association of North America - info@cremationsassociations.org
- International Order of the Golden Rule - info@ogr.org
- National Funeral Directors Association - http://www.nfda.org
- Selected Independent Funeral Homes - http://www.selectedfuneralhomes.org
- Funeral Service Association of Canada - http://www.fsac.ca
National Self-Help Organizations and Support Groups
- AARP, Widowed Person's Services - http://www.aarp.org
Independent branches of this organization can be found by searching online for Widowed Persons Services and the name of your town and state. - American Association of Suicidology - http://suicidology.org
Information and resources; referrals to suicide survivor groups - Center for Loss and Life Transition - http://centerforloss.com
Resources, education and training, and referral for bereaved families; provides certificate program in Death and Grief studies for bereavement professionals - The Compassionate Friends - http://www.compassionatefriends.org
Information and resources for bereaved families who have experienced the death of a child - The Dougy Center - http://www.dougy.org
Information, education, referral and support for children and families; publishes a national directory of support programs for bereaved children - Share - http://nationalshare.org
Pregnancy and infant loss support - Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) - http://www.MADD.org
Education, resources and advocacy for bereaved families - Parents of Murdered Children, Inc - http://www.pomc.com
Information, resources and support for bereaved families - National Hospice and Palliative Care - http://www.nhpco.org
- National Institute of Mental Health Public Inquiries - http://www.nimh.nih.gov
Education and publications for families and professionals
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RANNEY-BAINBRIDGE FUNERAL HOME
106 NORTH 10TH STREET
WHEATON, MN 56296
(320) 563-8136
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